Dana Gutkowski
Latest posts by Dana Gutkowski (see all)
- How can I be a good aunt? - May 19, 2021
- Aunt Quotes - March 19, 2021
- End Your Silence. Support Black Lives Matter - June 29, 2020
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When deciding whether or not your babysitter is a good fit for your family, you have to rely on instinct. Listen to their responses, take note of their body language, and be conscious of the feelings you get when you’re in their presence.
Hiring a complete stranger can be scary. You’re probably looking for someone with the qualities included in my post 11 Characteristics of a Great Babysitter.
On the other hand, there are other traits that you should be on the lookout for too. What are these traits? They’re the warning signs of a bad babysitter.
At first, some of these may seem harmless. But as time passes, you may find out they’re actually indicators that the babysitter is not a good match.
What are those red flags that you should be on the
1.) Uses the word easy
Their reasoning behind wanting to babysit is to “make some easy money”. Or perhaps, “It’s an easy job for someone my age.”.
Easy is not a word that should be associated with anything related to children. It’s not easy, it’s actually quite demanding and a huge
Why is this alarming? Because the person is implying that they are not going to put in much effort to do their job. Also, they might have limited experience with watching children and therefore don’t know what it really takes to watch children.
Either way, this is a lazy mindset to have when it comes to employment. And it could mean they have no plans to truly interacting with your children.
Tune your ear to catch them using this word.
2.) They’re late to an interview
If they’re not on time for an interview, it might be an indication that they’ll be late to watch your children.
You’re a parent so that often means that you’re operating a tight schedule. You have things that need to be done by specific times. The people you are using as support need to respect that.
Now things happen at unfortunate times. It’s called Murphy’s law. So I wouldn’t necessarily write them off for being late to an interview. However, I also wouldn’t give them the job immediately.
If you like them despite the fact that they were late, try them out on a practice day. Don’t make it on a day when you have an appointment to get to. Invite them over on a weekend or after work so that you can get some grocery shopping done. See if they’re able to make it to that on time.
Usually prepared and highly responsible people will leave ample time to get to a place when they know they’re needed. So it could have been a fluke, or it could be an indication that they’re always going to be late.
3.) Your child’s behavior changes
It may take your child a little while to warm up to the new sitters. Sure, kids can get clingy and needy when change comes about, but that should stop after a while.
Is the child not warming up after a few visits with the sitter? Or are they putting up a fight when it’s time for you to leave the house?
Every child’s adjustment period is different so the time it should take for them to get comfortable can vary drastically. However, don’t be too quick to disregard their behaviors. It doesn’t matter if the child is verbal or nonverbal, parents know when something is up with their kids. Pay attention to it.
4.) They’re vague or secretive about the time spent with your child
As a parent, leaving your child with someone whom you barely know can be nerveracking. One of the things that can help ease that nervousness is to know how the day went with the kids.
If the babysitter doesn’t give feedback, even after asking specific questions, they might not be doing the best job. They may have just put them in front of the television or handed them a tablet for the day.
Good babysitters will have a plan, abide by a preapproved list of activities, serve snacks or meals, and adhere to the rules of the house. In the beginning stages, they should go over with you what they’ve done for the day.
5.) They’re telling you how to parent your child
It can sometimes be good to hear feedback and suggestions about parenting styles. However, it can also be a dealbreaker for you with your babysitter.
Babysitters can provide you with a different perspective about your child as the outsider looking in. It’s good to listen to what they have to say, but be wary of those telling you how you should parent. There’s a difference.
If your babysitter is telling you how to raise your child there will most likely be many power struggles. This will then lead to frustration and probably insubordination on their part. If they’re not willing to listen and do what you ask of them, they’re probably not the right fit. No one wants a babysitter like that.
There’s no use in trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. Look out for these warning signs of a bad babysitter. Keep searching until you find the one that fits with your needs. It’ll serve you best to wait.
Ultimately, you always have to be listening to your instincts. When something feels off, you’re usually right about it.
Don’t believe me? Malcom Gladwell wrote a whole book on it called Blink. I’m a huge fan of his and have read nearly all of his books. He provides an insightful and easy to digest account of why we CAN and SHOULD trust our instincts. In fact, we make most of our decisions about people within the blink of and yes, hence the title.
If you’re interested in the psychology behind decision making,
Check it out on Amazon:
